Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
