he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
