Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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