Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
