im so drunk with asians
where?
always
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
