I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
