O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
