I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
