yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Randomize
