hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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