Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
