Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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