white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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