he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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