bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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