:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
