Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Randomize
