i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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