so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
You can't motorboat a personality
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
