I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
