she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
