So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
