apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
