Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Randomize
