I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
So vagazzling was a success
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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