so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
