i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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