Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
