Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
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