I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
