do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
