dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
