is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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