4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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