'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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