is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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