Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Randomize
