I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
