I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
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