Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
