okay pat passed out under dana's car
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
