guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
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