Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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