It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Randomize
