I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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