How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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