Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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