What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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