Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
