watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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